How To Back Away From Technology

Apparently smart phones are messing with our digits.

More specifically, with our thumbs.

Like actually changing the way they look, the shape of them. Some might call this evolution of sorts, I call it bloody creepy. Our bodies are actually altering because of the amount of time we spend using our mobile phones. I am staring down at the keyboard looking for signs of oddness with my mitts. I have never been so aware of my hands before. It is deeply unsettling. Like that time I really started thinking more about milk and how we are actually the only mammals that drink milk from another species. Span me right out.

Weird alterations to our appendages aside, I can’t help but feel like we are really missing out on a huge portion of our lives because we are constantly distracted by scrolling through a newsfeed.

I remember being on Bondi beach in Australia with my friend Chris, eating ham sandwiches and drinking a bottle of whiskey. I was wearing the one and only bikini I had packed and a pair of denim shorts that had quite honestly seen better days.

The sea was spectacular. Cobalt blue. Sure, the day was a little overcast and my view was slightly blocked by a rather hairy man we dubbed ‘Raul,’ but it was one of those moments you should pause and register. Take a breath. Look around you. Listen. And I was listening…to the screeching sound of two British girls behind us. “Oh don’t mind us,” one girl cooed. “We’re travel bloggers just doing a shoot.” I just shrugged and looked at my mate. Surely their subject matter was in front of them? The sea (and Raul) and the sky. The sand. The beach. Not the seventeen thousand outfits they slipped into like actors in a play, nor the hundreds of snaps they must have took on their fancy pants cameras which they were sure made them look too fat, too flat chested, too whatever.

I wasn’t annoyed. I was just sad for them. Here we were, on the other side of the world, and all they cared about was how many likes one picture would achieve on Instagram if they just showed a little bit more boob, or how many hits on their blog they would accrue if they just applied another layer of goopy lip-gloss.

I don’t want to live in a world where spending hours taking and doctoring photos is the norm. I don’t want to constantly compare my experience of life with someone else’s. Don’t get me wrong I love social media and, as someone who blogs, I am a huge fan of WordPress, Twitter and Instagram. screenshot_2016-11-25-17-29-27

I just don’t want to live my life in a fake advert where nothing around me is real. Where that cup of coffee the girl is holding is probably tepid at best because it’s taken sixteen shots to get the light just right or she’s thrown a wobbly about the angle. I don’t want to spend hours carefully applying make up to get the ‘natural look.’ It bores me.

With this is mind, I’m going to talk a little about dating. This isn’t something I usually blog about because, you know, it’s all well and good putting my stories out there, but when its someone else’s tale too, I find it a bit strange to give you the deets. Well fear not, boys I have dated. This is just a generic observation. A comment about me, not you.

I am sick and tired of “app dating.” Sure, it has it perks. You can quite happily chat along with a nice man when you are in your pjs eating your seventh hobnob, or wearing your hideous pjs, without being judged. But it’s the same as everything we seem to view on our smartphones. Its disposable. There are so many anonymous faces for us to swipe through, click on and judge. There’s something about it that leaves me feeling a little bit sad. We are a generation of no romance. Of selfishness. A generation from “the grass is greener” school of thought where there is always someone else out there. We approach the world of love like someone might a job, selling our best sides, posting only our best pictures. Watering down our responses to seem a little more palatable. It’s exhausting and, quite frankly, I don’t think I ever learned the rules to the “dating game.” I’d rather just keep being myself.

So, with this in my mind, lovely, newly-single housemate and I have decided to get offline and take ourselves out IRL. All in the name of science, of course **puts on nerdy science type goggles.**

What happens to those of us who stay out of the game playing?

Are we able to meet people IRL anymore? Or is it like when you make eye contact with someone on the tube in London? A mortal sin.

I am looking forward to disconnecting from the online world and getting myself back in the land of the living.

I urge you to all join us.



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